By Adam (@pochemuchkaproductions)
This article has been one that I’ve wanted to write for a very long time. The idea for it has been sitting in the back of my mind, but a recent event has brought it to the forefront.
That event was a post on Facebook by Emmanuel Adebayor, of Arsenal, Man City, and now Tottenham fame, in which he talked about the actions of his family members in regards to his wanting to give them a better life. It is a sentiment shared by professional athletes around the world, and especially those who watched their families sacrifice many things when they were younger, to see them succeed and become professional athletes.
I’m not going to go through the article word-for-word, because you can read it yourself and decide your own opinion on the matter. What I will say is that this is not the first, and definitely not the last we will hear about this. This issue goes much deeper than professional sports as well, it delves deep into society’s perception of money, how much we desire and want it, and to what lengths we as humans are willing to go to have it. Emmanuel is just one of many athletes who have been caught in the theoretical no-mans-land in regards to helping their families. Where they want to give their families a comfortable life, but instead the family members take advantage of the athlete, and ruin the relationships that were once present.
And as I said earlier, this ties in directly to society as a whole now a days.
If there is one thing that everyone in society wishes that they had more of, the first response out of nearly everyone would be money. Not love, not happiness, not friends, opportunities, experiences, or anything else like that. But money. We are a society that is driven by money. We look around and we see people with things that we would like to have. We are bombarded in the media to buy more things so that we can stay with the times. We work long hours, many in jobs we don’t like, or study for positions and professions that we may not really be interested in. But we do it because we want the money.
In past civilizations, richness was thought of in different ways. First it was ability to hunt and gather food. Then it was leading armies, strength, honor, allegiances and power. Then it became things like currency, resources, land, and soon it graduated to a combination of many of these pieces at once. But as our civilizations have modernized, the definition of “riches” is one that differs from person to person…and in here lies the rub.
You have those that value material things; money, vehicles, big houses, all the luxurious things in life. Then you have those that value experiences like travelling the world, meeting amazing people, and trying new things. Then there are those that value happiness, who strive to feel good and to make those around them feel good as well. And there are so many more interpretations and ideas of what “riches” are, that it would take pages and pages to fully describe them all.
With professional athletes, they should theoretically be a beneficiary of many of these definitions of riches. They are paid handsomely, they travel around the world, get to experience many cultures and awesome experiences, and hypothetically are doing something that they love to do. For many outside observers, it is a dream come true.
But if we look at it from the other side of the looking glass, there is a much different picture at play.
In that the this combination of the Riches Trifecta is also a catalyst and attracting force for those that desire the same things, but are unable to reach them on their own. And unfortunately, with athletes, these people usually end up being family or people close to family.
You can see this illustrated by Emmanuel in his post, but there are countless other examples that follow a similar mould of occurrences. And it is the athlete that is left as the bad guy within it all.
This is the part I don’t understand.
I am definitely one of the first people that would raise their hand to the question of whether I agreed that athletes wages are extremely inflated. Because I do. But I also would be the first one to raise their hand to agree with the sentiment that just because someone has riches, doesn’t mean that they are entitled to be harassed and mooched off of.
Because they have earned the right to these riches from the skills they have developed over their lives. These are men and women who trained and trained when they were young, learned their craft, competed, and became the best in their sports. They have earned the rewards that come with it.
The problem though as I said in the beginning, is that in that first stage of development, it is the parents and family who take the brunt of the sacrifice to give the kid this chance. Parents who put portions of their wages into new equipment, lessons, and training for their child. Being the support for their kid as they competed, learnt to win, learnt to lose, and grew as a person. No one is denying this sacrifice, especially the athletes that make it and succeed. This is why you see athletes wanting to create a better life for their families, because of everything that they know their families did to get them where they are now.
But there is a difference between “making a comfortable life” and “being taken advantage of”, and it seems that the families of some athletes are unable to comprehend the difference between the two viewpoints.
And too many athletes have been taken advantage of in this regard. Where their generosity and desire to give their families a comfortable life have been turned into them becoming a sort of moneybag for the members of their family to stick their hands out to, demanding money because “the athlete can afford it”. That’s not family anymore. That’s not “thank you for recognizing the sacrifice I made when you were growing up” and its now “you have money and I want it, and since I’m family, I will guilt you into giving it to me”.
This trend, seen with athletes, inheritance holders, heirs to fortunes, people in profitable professions, and the such, is one that will never get any sympathy either.
Because to the general public, those who will never see such money in their entire lives, and who desire and wish they could have such riches, it becomes a “you have the money, what’s the problem?” reaction; or better known as “You are rich, I am not, thus you deserve this”.
It’s sad. But its also what is bred from jealousy and envy. And from the desire to accumulate riches.
Personally, if I could say something directly to Emmanuel, and to all those athletes that are in such a position like this, I would tell them to stay strong. And tell them that their heart was always in the right place, and that what happened wasn’t their fault. Because it wasn’t.
They didn’t ask to be rich. They trained, developed, and competed hard and through their labor, were determined to be valuable, and thus were monetarily valued in a highly fashion.
They chose to be an athlete. They didn’t choose to be rich.
And you know what another thing in life you can’t choose? Your family.
P.S. There was an interesting documentary that touched on this issue a bit as well, that was done by ESPN 30 for 30 called “Broke”, here is a link to it here: “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSOAwNSv8EM
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